Chinese Funeral Flowers: What to Send, What to Avoid, and What They Mean

You just found out a colleague's parent passed away. The wake is tomorrow at a void deck in Toa Payoh. You want to send flowers, but you're suddenly unsure — are roses acceptable? What colour is safe? Does the wreath need a banner? And where exactly do you deliver flowers to a void deck?

Getting funeral flowers wrong in a Chinese context isn't just awkward. It can deeply offend the grieving family during the worst week of their lives. Here's what you need to know.

Which Flowers Are Appropriate for a Chinese Funeral

White and yellow chrysanthemums are the standard. In Chinese culture, chrysanthemums symbolise grief, mourning, and the hope of rebirth. At Buddhist wakes, you'll see them arranged prominently on the altar alongside incense and a portrait of the deceased. They're the safest, most universally accepted choice across every dialect group — Hokkien, Teochew, Cantonese, Hakka, Hainanese.

Beyond chrysanthemums, white lilies and white orchids are also widely appropriate. White represents mourning and purity in Chinese tradition, making any white bloom a respectful option. Some florists include touches of pale purple or soft lavender, which are generally acceptable as subdued, dignified tones.

What you absolutely must avoid: red flowers. Red is the colour of celebration, luck, and joy in Chinese culture — weddings, Lunar New Year, baby showers. Sending red roses or red carnations to a funeral is the floral equivalent of wearing a bright red dress to the wake. It signals celebration, which is deeply inappropriate.

Other colours to steer clear of include bright yellow (associated with festivity rather than mourning), hot pink, and orange. If in doubt, stick to white. You cannot go wrong with an all-white arrangement.

One important exception: if the deceased was over 80 years old and lived what the family considers a full, blessed life, the funeral may be treated as a xi sang (joyful departure). In these cases, the family might use pink decorations and mourning pins. But unless the family explicitly signals this, default to white and muted tones.

Funeral Wreaths: Ordering, Pricing, and What Goes on the Banner

In Singapore and Malaysia, the most common way to send funeral flowers is as a standing wreath — a large circular or heart-shaped arrangement on a tripod stand, displayed outside the wake venue alongside other wreaths from friends, colleagues, and extended family.

What wreaths typically cost

Funeral wreath prices in Singapore generally range from $80 to $250, depending on the size and flower selection. A standard condolence wreath with chrysanthemums and lilies runs around $100 to $150. Premium arrangements with orchids or larger displays push toward $200 and above. Most florists offer specific "condolence" or "funeral" categories on their websites — don't order from the "congratulations" section by accident.

In Malaysia, wreaths are somewhat cheaper, typically ranging from RM 200 to RM 600 for comparable arrangements. Major cities like Kuala Lumpur and Penang have numerous florists experienced with Chinese funeral orders.

The banner matters

Every funeral wreath should include a banner — a sash or ribbon with text printed across it. This isn't optional. The banner tells the family who sent the flowers and expresses the sentiment.

Standard wording follows a simple format:

• Top line: A short condolence phrase — "In Loving Memory," "Rest in Peace," "Deepest Condolences," or the Chinese equivalent such as "沉痛哀悼" (with deep sorrow) or "永远怀念" (forever remembered)
• Bottom line: Your name, or your family name, or your company/department name

For example: "Deepest Condolences — From the Marketing Team, ABC Corp" or "永远怀念 — 李家敬挽" (Forever Remembered — from the Lee family, with respect).

If you're ordering on behalf of a group of colleagues, pool the money for one larger wreath rather than sending multiple small ones. One substantial wreath with the department name looks more unified and takes up less space at the venue.

Timing your order

Order the wreath as soon as you learn about the wake. Most Singapore florists offer same-day delivery if you order before noon, but funeral wreaths during peak periods (especially around Qingming or the seventh lunar month) may take longer. Give yourself at least a few hours of lead time.

If the wake has already been running for a day or two, it's still appropriate to send flowers. Wreaths are displayed throughout the entire 3, 5, or 7-day wake period.

Delivering Flowers to a Void Deck Wake

HDB void deck wakes are the most common funeral venue in Singapore. If you've never delivered flowers to one, the logistics can feel unclear.

The void deck is the open ground floor of an HDB block. The funeral director sets up tentage, an altar, seating, and a reception area. Wreaths are typically arranged in rows on stands flanking the entrance or along the sides of the tentage.

When ordering from a florist, provide:

• The block number and street name (e.g., Blk 123 Toa Payoh Lorong 4)
• Specify it's a void deck funeral — experienced florists know the drill
• The name of the deceased so the delivery driver can confirm the correct wake (multiple wakes sometimes happen on the same block)

The florist's delivery team will set up the wreath on its tripod stand at the venue. You don't need to be there for delivery. If you're attending the wake in person and bringing a smaller bouquet, hand it to whoever is managing the reception table near the entrance — they'll place it appropriately.

For Malaysian wakes held under street canopies, the same principle applies. Provide the house address and the name of the deceased. Florists in KL, Penang, and Johor Bahru are well-versed in funeral delivery protocols.

Flowers You Bring Personally vs. Wreaths You Send

There's a distinction between the large standing wreaths sent to the venue and smaller personal bouquets or arrangements you might bring when attending the wake.

Standing wreaths are the formal gesture — they're displayed publicly and signal respect from organisations, friend groups, or extended family branches. If you're attending as a casual acquaintance or colleague, a wreath from your group plus your individual Bai Jin (condolence money in a white envelope) is the complete package.

If you want to bring a small personal bouquet when you visit, a simple hand-tied arrangement of white chrysanthemums or white lilies is appropriate. Keep it modest. The focus should be on paying respects at the altar and expressing condolences to the family, not on the size of your floral gift.

Some families also accept fruit baskets or food hampers as alternatives, though flowers remain the most traditional and widely accepted choice.

What Happens to the Flowers After the Wake

Funeral flowers are not kept by the family. After the wake concludes and the funeral procession departs for the crematorium or cemetery, the tentage and floral displays are dismantled. The funeral director's team handles the removal.

Some families request that certain wreaths accompany the cortege to the crematorium, where they're placed near the committal area for the final prayers. After the cremation or burial, the flowers are disposed of by the venue staff or funeral director.

This means your wreath serves its purpose during the wake itself — it's seen by the family and every visitor who comes to pay respects. The family's reception team typically records who sent each wreath in the same ledger used for condolence money contributions, maintaining the network of reciprocity that's central to Chinese funeral customs.

A Quick Checklist Before You Order

1. Colour: White or yellow chrysanthemums, white lilies, white orchids. No red, no bright colours.
2. Type: Standing wreath for formal/group gestures. Small hand bouquet if attending personally.
3. Banner: Include a condolence phrase and your name or group name. Ask the florist to print it.
4. Budget: $100-$150 covers a standard wreath in Singapore. RM 200-$400 in Malaysia.
5. Delivery: Provide the block number, street, and deceased's name. Order early.
6. Timing: Send as soon as you learn about the wake. Same-day delivery is usually available.

Planning or attending a Chinese funeral involves dozens of decisions beyond flowers — from void deck permits to dialect-specific rites to the exact amount of condolence money. The Traditional Chinese Funeral — Singapore & Malaysia guide walks you through every step so nothing falls through the cracks during the hardest week of your life.