Tamang Gurung Sherpa Buddhist Funeral Nepal

42 Days, Not 13

If your family follows Tamang, Gurung, or Sherpa Buddhist traditions, the 13-day Khas-Brahmin mourning timeline does not apply. Buddhist communities in Nepal observe a 42-day mourning period, while Tibetan Buddhist cosmology describes the bardo — the intermediate state between death and rebirth — as a 49-day passage.

The practical consequence is significant: mourning restrictions, dietary rules, and ceremonial obligations extend three times longer than the Hindu Brahmin standard. Planning for this longer period, especially for working families and those in the diaspora, requires a fundamentally different approach.

The Ghewa Ceremony

The ghewa is the central Buddhist memorial rite, held within the first few days of death. It brings together the community for prayers, offerings, and a communal feast. Unlike Hindu mourning meals, which are strictly vegetarian during the kriya period, the ghewa feast traditionally includes meat — a distinction that can surprise families from mixed Hindu-Buddhist backgrounds.

Lamas or monks officiate the ghewa, leading prayers for the soul's passage through the intermediate state. Some families use prayers from the Bardo Thodol (Tibetan Book of the Dead); butter lamps and donations to the presiding monastery may also form part of the ceremony according to community custom.

The Gurung Arghum

Gurung funeral traditions include the arghum, a three-day memorial ceremony that stands apart from both the Hindu kriya and the standard Buddhist ghewa. Three distinct spiritual specialists may be involved:

• Pachyu shamans: practitioners of the pre-Buddhist Bon tradition who perform divination and soul guidance
• Kyabri priests: Bon officiants who handle specific ritual elements
• Lamas: Buddhist monks who conduct the prayer recitations

During the arghum, the family constructs a pla — a life-size clothing effigy of the deceased — and performs the release of a psychopomp bird, a ritual meant to carry the soul toward its next incarnation. The effigy is dressed in the deceased's own garments and seated at the place of honor during the final feast.

Sherpa and Tamang Variations

Sherpa communities, with their close ties to Tibetan Buddhism, follow practices most aligned with monastic tradition. Disposal may involve cremation or hill disposal; historical accounts also describe sky burials in remote areas. After cremation, ashes may be mixed with clay to form tsa-tsa — small Buddhist reliquary tablets that are placed in sacred locations.

Tamang traditions blend Buddhist liturgy with indigenous practices. The Tamang Lama performs the funeral rites, but the specific sequence of offerings and the location of the cremation or burial follow community-specific rules that vary by village and clan.

Mixed-Family Considerations

In Nepal's hill communities, intermarriage between Hindu and Buddhist families is common. When a death occurs in a mixed family, the question of which tradition to follow can become contentious. If the deceased left expressed wishes, bring them to the family elders and the relevant lama or ritual specialist; otherwise, consult them before choosing a sequence.

For families navigating these distinctions, our Hindu Funeral — Nepal guide covers the major Buddhist, Hindu, and Kirant variations side by side, including the specific mourning timelines, dietary rules, and ceremonial requirements for each tradition.