Funeral Flowers and Donations in Lieu of Flowers in Ireland

Reading the Death Notice First

Before ordering flowers for an Irish funeral, check the death notice on RIP.ie. Many families specify "family flowers only, please" or "donations, if desired, in lieu of flowers, to [named charity]." Ignoring this request — however well-intentioned — puts the family in an awkward position and adds to the logistical burden of managing dozens of arrangements during an already overwhelming three days.

If the notice says nothing about flowers, sending an arrangement is appropriate and welcome.

Choosing Funeral Flowers

Traditional choices for Irish funerals lean toward white and cream arrangements — lilies, roses, and chrysanthemums are the most common. A standing spray or a sheaf arrangement is appropriate from friends, work colleagues, or acquaintances. Closer relatives sometimes send wreaths or casket sprays.

Most Irish florists offer funeral-specific ranges and can deliver directly to the funeral home or the family's home for the wake. Order as early as possible — many florists in smaller towns handle multiple funerals in the same week and can run short on stock.

A handwritten card accompanying the flowers matters more than the arrangement itself. Keep it simple: "Thinking of you and your family at this difficult time" or the traditional Irish "I'm sorry for your trouble."

Wreaths and Their Meaning

Wreaths carry a specific significance at Irish funerals. The circular shape symbolises eternal life — a point of genuine theological meaning in the Catholic tradition. A family wreath placed on or near the coffin during the wake is common, and it often accompanies the hearse during the removal procession to the church.

If you're ordering a wreath rather than a spray or bouquet, make sure the florist understands it's for funeral display. Funeral wreaths are constructed differently from decorative ones — they need to sit flat on a coffin lid or stand upright on an easel at the graveside.

Donations Instead of Flowers

When a death notice requests donations in lieu of flowers, the family has chosen to direct the community's generosity toward a cause that mattered to the deceased. Common named charities include the Irish Cancer Society, Irish Hospice Foundation, the Alzheimer Society of Ireland, and the Kevin Bell Repatriation Trust.

To make a donation, you can contribute directly through the charity's website (most offer an "in memory of" option), send a cheque to the charity with the deceased's name, or place a cash contribution in an envelope at the wake or funeral home, where a collection box is often set up.

Some families ask for donations to the local parish church or a specific religious order. In these cases, a Mass card — purchased at the parish office with a donation to the priest for the intention of the deceased — serves both the spiritual and the charitable purpose.

Memorial Contributions and Mass Cards

Mass cards remain the most significant spiritual gift at an Irish Catholic funeral. The donor gives a stipend to a priest, who is then canonically obligated to offer a Mass for the repose of the deceased's soul. Under Section 99 of the Charities Act 2009, it's a criminal offence to sell Mass cards in Ireland without a formal agreement approved by a Catholic Bishop — penalties can reach €300,000 or ten years' imprisonment.

Valid Mass cards should be purchased unsigned from a parish office or an authorised religious order, not from commercial retailers. The priest signs the card after accepting the stipend.

If you're sending a card from abroad, many Irish dioceses accept online Mass offerings and can post the signed card to the family.

What to Bring to the Wake House

Beyond flowers and cards, it's traditional to bring practical offerings to a wake house. Boxes of biscuits, trays of sandwiches, home-baked cakes, or cartons of milk help feed the continuous stream of visitors over two to three days. In close-knit communities, neighbours also lend extra dining chairs, teapots, and cutlery.

For more on managing wake hospitality and the full funeral planning process, see our Catholic Funeral — Ireland guide.