Keriah: The Jewish Mourning Ritual of Tearing a Garment

What Keriah Is

Keriah (also spelled k'riah or kriah) is the act of tearing a garment as an expression of grief immediately before a Jewish funeral. It's one of the oldest mourning rituals in Judaism — the Book of Genesis records Jacob tearing his garments upon hearing of Joseph's apparent death. The tear represents the rupture in the mourner's life: something that was whole has been irreparably broken.

The ritual is performed by the seven categories of primary mourners: parents, children, siblings, and spouses of the deceased.

How It's Done

The mourners stand — standing during keriah symbolizes meeting grief with strength rather than collapsing before it. The rabbi or funeral director makes an initial cut in the mourner's outer garment (a shirt, blouse, jacket, or scarf), and the mourner then extends the tear by hand. The ripping sound is part of the ritual. It's physical, visceral, and intentionally so.

The side matters:

• For a parent (mother or father): the tear is made on the left side, over the heart. This placement recognizes the unique and irreplaceable bond between parent and child.
• For all other relatives (spouse, sibling, child): the tear is made on the right side.

As the garment is torn, the mourner recites the blessing:

"Baruch Atah Adonai Eloheinu Melech Ha-olam, Dayan Ha-Emet." ("Blessed are You, Lord our God, Ruler of the Universe, the True Judge.")

This is followed by the verse from Job: "Adonai natan, v'Adonai lakach; yehi shem Adonai m'vorach" — "The Lord has given and the Lord has taken; blessed be the name of the Lord."

Garment vs. Ribbon

Conservative halakhah strongly encourages tearing an actual garment rather than a symbolic black ribbon. The reasoning is straightforward: keriah is meant to be an emotional release, and tearing a ribbon you'll throw away in a week doesn't carry the same weight as tearing a shirt you were wearing when you got the news.

That said, many funeral homes hand out small black ribbons with a pin as a convenience, and many families use them. Your rabbi won't refuse to perform the service over this choice. The ribbon serves as a visible marker of mourning — people who see it know to offer condolences rather than casual greetings.

If you choose to tear an actual garment, pick something you're willing to wear throughout shiva. You don't need to tear your best suit jacket. A shirt, a blouse, or a dedicated outer layer works.

What Happens to the Torn Garment Afterward

The rules differ depending on who died:

For a parent:

• The torn garment can be basted (loosely stitched) only after thirty days (shloshim)
• It can never be permanently sewn — the visible mark of parental loss remains
• If you change clothes during shiva, the new garment must also be torn

For other relatives (spouse, sibling, child):

• The torn garment can be basted after seven days (the end of shiva)
• It can be permanently sewn after thirty days
• If you change clothes during shiva, you do not need to tear the new garment

These distinctions reflect a traditional hierarchy of mourning intensity, with parents occupying the highest position.

When Keriah Doesn't Happen

There are circumstances where keriah is delayed or modified:

• If the death occurs on Shabbat or a major holiday, keriah is postponed until after the holy day ends.
• Very young children (under bar/bat mitzvah age) are not required to perform keriah, though some families include adolescents.
• Delayed news of a death: If you learn of a death after the funeral, ask your rabbi whether keriah is still appropriate; timing can affect the practice.

Why It Matters

Keriah is one of the few Jewish mourning practices that gives grief a physical outlet. In a tradition that's largely verbal — prayers, blessings, responsive readings — the act of ripping fabric with your hands creates a moment that registers in the body, not just the mind. Many mourners describe it as the point where the reality of the loss finally broke through.

For the full sequence of Conservative Jewish funeral rituals — from keriah through the burial, shiva, and the year of mourning — our mourning guide covers every step with the blessings, timelines, and practical guidance families need.